Wednesday, June 30, 2004

Chapter 22 1976….Bye bye Oak Harbor

Our marriage so far was ok. We only had the one fight, and I continued bartending the day shift from 10-6pm and Larry worked on the base in VP-69. Larry would come in to the bar when he got off work and wait for me to get off work. I would get off and get my going off drink and then the balance game would begin. We had to finish our drinks together before we went home! Most nights we got home around 10PM, I would make dinner then we would go to bed. We would go to the functions that the American Legion put on, the yearly picnics, early bird dinner, the Peace Gavel passing. The Peace Gavel passing was a FUN function!! One year the Canadian Legion would come down to our place and put on a parade in town with their bagpipe band and end up at our Legion and PARTY all day and night!! One year we went to White Rock, British Columbia in a bus. I got the privilege to bartend on the bus to and from!! Whooo hooo!! And all the drinks I could drink for FREE!! Man was that a challenge standing in the back of the bus all the way to Canada pouring drinks and swaying with the turns! If I remember right, I slept on the bus as soon as we got there and don’t remember much of the festivities!! (Typical).
I was beginning to black out a few times more than usual in those days. I didn’t drink every day, and I didn’t get drunk every time I drank, but I did seem to make a fool of myself about once a month! One time was our first wedding anniversary. I worked until 6PM then we were going to go out to a nice dinner and then have a romantic evening. HA!! As usual, Larry had a full beer when it was time to go. People kept buying us drinks, and Larry really didn’t want to go to dinner, so we ended up staying at the Legion! I was upset, and got drunk!! As quick as I drank there was another drink waiting for me. We were sitting at the bar, and Larry was on my right and some good looking guy was on my left. The guy on my left was flirting with me so I flirted back. (This story was told to me the next day, as I have no recollection whatsoever of what happened)! I guess I ended up making out with this guy at the bar, kissing up a storm with my husband sitting next to me!! Larry got me out of the bar and took me home and put me to bed and then went back to the bar and had a stare down with the guy! I cannot believe I did that, but the bartender said OH YES, YOU DID!! I have no idea who that was and according to the bartender it was the first and the last time anyone ever saw him. Oh well, Larry had fun being the bully!! I could just see him scraping his feet in the dirt after taking me home and marking his territory!!
Larry got his last set of orders in June. He was to report to Hartford Connecticut July 15th. He was afraid I wouldn’t go, but I was all excited to have a new adventure ahead of me!! We had two cats and a Pinto station wagon. We had the movers come and pack the household goods and we packed the station wagon with what we would need for a month and the two cats, then headed to Hartford!

Tomorrow….Hartford, Connecticut!!

Tuesday, June 29, 2004

Chapter 21…My Wedding.

Everyone I knew was happy for me. My parents were glad that Larry and I were getting married. Larry was a level headed responsible person that would keep me in line. I needed someone to put a hold on me and keep me out of trouble. I didn’t know much about Larry at all, so we spent the next two weeks getting to know each other. I found out that I was going to be wife #4!! Larry was 33 years old and had two kids from previous marriages and who knows how many from affairs. He doesn’t communicate with his former wives or children. That bothered me, but I figured I could encourage him to send birthday cards and Christmas presents to the kids. I made a mental note to remind him to. I went out and got drunk the night before our wedding and ended up at an old roommate’s house. I was getting cold feet and was crying! I told Ellie that I was scared and that I didn’t really love Larry, but I loved the idea of getting married and settling down. I was getting tired of the party life. I was 25 years old, almost 26. It was time to change. A few of my drinking buddies weren’t happy about it. They threatened Larry that he better treat me good or he would have to answer to them!!

We went to a Judges chamber to get married. My Mom & Dad, Larry and me and my old friend Ellie were in attendance. After the vows we all went out to dinner at the “Captain Whidbey Inn” on the water on Penn Cove. It is a quaint old place.
Larry took me to meet his parents in Edmonds about 40 miles away the following week. He introduced me as his new wife. He never told them we were getting married, but it didn’t shock them at all. I guess they were used to it. Larry was an only child. I felt very awkward, but they welcomed me with open arms. They were great people.
I had a 1967 red Thunderbird with black cloth roof & black leather tuck & roll upholstery. I loved that car. It broke down and I was told it would cost $500.00 to fix it, so Larry convinced me to trade it in on a better vehicle. We went to the Ford dealer and he traded it in on a 1972 brown Pinto station wagon!! OMG what did I marry??!! That should’ve told me then to get out!! But nooooo, I had to endure more humiliation!!
I continued to bartend at the Legion and Larry would go to work at the base. He would come in on his lunch hour and drink a beer or two then head back, or I would call his Chief and tell him Larry has a flat tire or something and he would stay at the bar all day. I would get off work at 6:00 and have a beer. Then Larry would order another beer, so I would too. This kept up just about every night, then we would go home around 10 or midnight or 2AM and he would ask what was for dinner. One night I was tired and drunk and he asked what was for din-din, so I opened the refrigerator door and started throwing frozen food all over the kitchen and said “Take your f---ing pick”!!!! Then I went to bed.
We moved to a trailer and it was a lot nicer than the apartment we were staying at, so I decided to throw a housewarming party. I planned the appetizers and mixed drinks and beer, cleaned the house, sent out invitations to his boss and people he worked with, my parents and just about everyone we knew. I worked until 6, the day of the party. When I got home I asked Larry to go get some ice. Everyone showed up and still no Larry. I was getting really worried. I called the police, the hospital, his parents, all the bars, and still no Larry!! The party broke up about 2AM and Larry never came home until the next day. I asked him where he went and he said to the beach! I asked why, and he said he didn’t like parties. I told him it was a fine way of telling me!! He never let on once that he preferred if we didn’t throw a party! We had a huge fight and I ran home to mom & dad. I was crying with mom when dad was backing out of the driveway and ran right into my …er…Larry’s station wagon!! What a day that was!!!

Monday, June 28, 2004

Chapter 20….more American Legion

I made a lot of friends (actually, “drinking buddies”) working at the American Legion. We had parties after work and went to breakfast after that sometimes at 4AM. I lived in a studio apartment with a swimming pool right in front of my apartment. There was a fence around it and was locked at night. That didn’t stop us. We would strip down to our undies and go swimming! Life was one huge party!! (still is)
I’m not going to go into all the sordid details of the men I dated (or passed out with) (or “came to” next to). But once in awhile I would wake up in some strange place and think “OH SHIT!!“ Who? Where??? I would be afraid to turn over to see who I was with. Or I would go to work and face the music of what happened the night before. I just hated it that I allowed myself to get that drunk again and out of control! Dang, I’d say!! Never again!! HA!!
I joined a woman’s pool league. I learned how to shoot pool in Virginia Beach by a pool hustler. He spent a lot of time teaching me “English” on the cue stick and the cue ball, and made me practice just shooting the cue ball up and down the table. He was good, and so was I after awhile. He taught me to aim right and shoot easy and not hard. I wasn’t very good on the women’s pool league because I was usually drunk by the time we started at 7PM. I also joined a woman’s softball team. I wasn’t good at that either because I usually was either hung over or getting drunk. I wasn’t even good at drinking because I would drink way too much! Some people pass out at a certain stage or get sick, I would just keep on going in a black out!
I hung around a group of sailors that smoked pot. I wasn’t really into that because it made my heart race when I got my “rush”, and I would get all scared that I was gonna have a heart attack!! I’d reach over and grab my wrist and take my pulse and I’d act all creepy then everyone would giggle and say “Look, Phyllis is getting her rush”!! HAHAHAHA nothing like a hypochondriac on dope!! I would usually just drink beer and roll the joints for the others and let them smoke the dope. I was the juicer, and they were the heads! I learned how to roll the joints using a dollar bill to cradle the tobacco then roll it into the paper. I can still do that, but of course I don’t go near drugs now. REALLY!!
I got a phone call at work in August and it was Jacque from Virginia Beach. Ed Free was killed in a car wreck on a bridge by Lori’s house. The band “The new Legend” (I just remembered the name of the band!!) was in the car going to a gig in Florida. They never made it out of Virginia Beach. I can’t remember if the entire band was killed or not, but I remember at least two were killed, one being Ed. That devastated me! I loved him and thought the world of him. He was a talented, kind and well liked person. How tragic!!

A guy named Mike was bartending at the Legion, and he was single too. We both drank a lot and were good friends. I met him when he came out of a treatment center. He said he was an alcoholic and cannot drink hard liquor but he can drink beer. I believed him, and would watch him and make sure he didn’t get into the hard stuff. I had no idea what an alcoholic was and the AA concept in those days, but I was to find out a few years later, hehehehe.
Mike and I moved in together at his shack (dump) in the country. We figured it was stupid to pay two rents when we spent so much time together. That was about September 1974.
I met a guy (Larry) that would come into the Legion and sit quietly at the bar by himself and drink Millers beer. I would work the day shift once in awhile and when I got off work I would ask him if he wanted to join a bunch of us to go bar hopping. Larry was a quiet loner type of guy that didn’t say a whole lot, but giggled at us having fun. We sort of adopted Larry into our group of crazies. Larry asked me out on a date around the first of October, and I went. When Larry brought me home Mike was sitting in the middle of the floor in the dark living room with a bottle of rum. He was drunk on his ass!! That scared me. October 15th Larry asked me out again and we went to dinner. He ordered drinks and we had plastic giraffes as picks that held the fruit in the drinks. He placed the two giraffes together like they were kissing, and asked me to marry him. I was rather shocked, as that was only our second date. But I didn’t like where I was at the moment in my life. I lost a dear friend, my roommate was a drunk alcoholic, I was a drunk and didn’t know what my future held. Larry was a first class in the Navy and planned on retiring. I thought about it for about 10 minutes then said yes. Larry moved me in to his apartment the next day. He talked with mom and dad and got their blessings, then we went to the courthouse to get a license. I asked what the rush was, and he said we are getting married, might as well do it now. So the date was set. Thursday October 31, 1974. Yep Halloween!! Go figure!!
Next segment..marriage!!

Sunday, June 27, 2004

Chapter 19….Oak Harbor!

I got to Coupeville where mom & dad lived and was going to stay with them for a month or so until I decided if I was going to move back to Virginia Beach. The situation with Dick got pretty serious and we both either needed to quit drinking and get serious or break it up.
I went to the American Legion Club with mom and dad and had a blast. I put in for a cocktail waitress job there. I have never worked in a cocktail lounge, just taverns. But I sure drank enough mixed drinks to figure it out, so I lied and said I was experienced. I was hired and was thrown to the Lions!! I would go get orders from people sitting at tables and give it to the bartender then try and remember what drink went where, and what drink was what. Well bourbon & 7, scotch and water & whiskey soda all looked alike!! I figured I would put the drinks in the order on my tray that I called them out, and bunched them together as per table. I caught on quick and would really hustle those drinks!! The more I served the more tips I got. I could take on about ten tables, and if I saw a hand go up and motion for a round of drinks I would know what drinks they were and get them to them as fast as possible! I worked my butt off, and never sat down once during the shift. The door man got to drink beer for free, so I would go to one bartender and ask for a beer for Jake then go the next bartender and ask for a beer for Jake. I always had a beer at the booth where Jake sat. As I would head out to the ballroom with a tray of drinks, I would duck into the booth and chug some beer. I got pretty sneaky with my drinking!! When the night was over we locked the doors and got a drink for ourselves and started cleaning the bar. Then we would sit and get as drunk as the patrons we served and bitched about earlier. We would sneak out of the place about 5AM and stagger home. I don’t know how I never got another DUI or killed anyone during that time. Whew, I shiver now thinking of it!! I got a call from Dick about a month after I got home and he asked me if I was coming back. I really didn’t know what to say, so I said no. We both cried and wished each other luck. Jacque, my good friend in Virginia Beach (she was born Feb 6th) called a few weeks later and asked if I would mind if she dated Dick. I told her I was through with him and gave her my blessing. They were married a few months later. Boy, those Southern gals are real polite to ask if I was through with the men before they started dating them!!
More later….

Saturday, June 26, 2004

Chapter 18 Ed Free!

Ed was a very talented man. He was roly poly cute and funny as heck! He played guitar, and when he sang he sounded like Elvis! He had a band and they played great Country music. For the life of me I cannot remember the name of his band. He had a single 45 made, and I have that record. He wrote the songs on it. “Donna on My Mind” and “Careful”.
The Red Baron Inn had a lot of changes when Ed returned. He tore out the gogo dancing stage and put in a dance floor and we had live music every weekend. Every Sunday we had a Bluegrass jam session. I never heard Bluegrass before, but man oh man did it ever get in my blood!! There was a lot of talent in that area!! I dated Ed for a few months. We had a lot of fun, but I had a hang up on relationships. I couldn’t relax or feel comfortable having an “affair”. It was wrong to do it if you were single, so I usually had to be drunk before I got comfortable with it. Drinking was my priority in those days. It got in the way with all my relationships. Ed’s ex mother in law was psychic, and told him to be careful on a bridge by Lori’s house. We never knew why she said that. She read my glass while I was on the dance floor and said that girl better quit drinking. What the Hell did she know??? Ed’s best friend was Ron Jean. He owned the Pungo Inn in Pungo Virginia. He was a taller version of Ed.
Ed and I decided to go separate ways after awhile. I never broke up fighting with the guys, we always just drifted apart. A gal asked me if I was through with Ed and I asked what she meant, and she said she’d like to date him. I told her to go ahead. They moved in together about three months later. Ron had broken up with his girlfriend, so we dated a few times. We decided we were better off drinking buddies than lovers. I then met a guy named Dick Laird. I remember the song on the juke box “Satin Sheets”. Dick’s ex wife kept playing that song and calling me dirty names. I had no idea what she meant. I ended up at Dick’s trailer and found out he had red Satin Sheets! OH! Now I know what she meant!! I found out too, that satin sheets are very slippery and not to wear anything satin between them. Also the pillows shoot out if you land on them hard. I giggled a lot in bed which doesn’t make a very sexy date!! But I had fun!
Dick was very patient with me and taught me a lot! His birthday was Feb 5 mine was Feb 4, Carol’s (my sister’s husband’s sister) was Feb 3.
Dick lived just over the North Carolina border in a trailer park on a lake. He had a boat and took me cane pole fishing for Bass. It was fun! We came up to a duck blind and he told me to reach out and give it a nudge so we can move around it. I did, and he yelled at me to be careful. I looked and saw a bunch of snakes!! EEEEEK!! That day we were in the middle of the lake and I heard distant thunder. I asked if we should head back and he said naw. Well about ten minutes later we were in the middle of one Hellatious thunderstorm!! Lightning was dancing across the water and right over our heads!! I was petrified!! I kept screaming to go back in, and he tried, but the blades kept getting hung up in the reeds in the water and he had to pull it out and pull the long grass from the blades about every three minutes!! I about ran to shore!! We finally got home and safe. I heard later that a guy was struck by lightning and killed sitting on the beach!!
We went skinny dipping in the lake one night and started to get romantic, and I felt something rub my leg. I wondered what it was and he said probably a black snake. He wasn’t finished with the sentence by the time I ran through the front door of his trailer screaming!!
Again we were on the lake on a nice day and he wanted to go skiing. I don’t know how to swim so he told me to drive the boat while he rode the ski’s . HA!! I was having fun, and he started yelling about the swimmers!! I looked ahead and saw a bunch of heads in the water, and I was heading right for them!! I think that was about it for the lake with me!!
I had left my cat with my old roommate in Oceana, and she told me to get rid of it because she was tired of cleaning up after it. I was feeling very guilty about not giving her the attention she needed so I had to take her to the SPCA. They assured me they will find a good home for her. Again, my drinking took first place over responsibility!
Dick loved to drink as much as I did and we tried to keep up with each other. After a few months I think I was ready for a break. My hangovers were killing me!! I couldn’t drink every day all the time because it made me so sick!! I decided to move my stuff back to my sister’s house and go home for a month or two. Dick agreed we needed a break, and I left on friendly terms. I was in Virginia Beach a year and 2 months. I got on a Greyhound bus in August of 1973 in Norfolk Virginia and it went up to Pennsylvania and over to Chicago and to Seattle. My friend Barry picked me up at the Bus depot in Seattle.
I lost my luggage in the Chicago depot when I changed buses. I got tipsy at the bus depot and got on the wrong bus. It went to Seattle, but stopping at all the stops. My luggage made it on the express bus!!
I took a fifth of Johnny Walker Red scotch on the bus with me and got a glass of water at every stop we made. Gads, I couldn’t even ride the bus without drinking!!
When I got to Seattle I went to report my missing luggage, and there it was waiting for me!!
Next…Oak Harbor!!

Friday, June 25, 2004

A day off

I am taking a day or two off of my story. I worked until 9PM tonight and I am bushed!! My mind needs a break from all the excitement from my Virginia Beach days anyway!

Tomorrow is FRIDAY!!! YAHOO!!

Today's thought...
There are three kinds of men:
The ones that learn by reading,
The few who learn by observation,
The rest of them have to pee on the electric
fence and find out for themselves

Have a FUN Friday!!

Wednesday, June 23, 2004

Chapter 17 yet more Virginia Beach

There were a lot of bars in the area. Bars meant beer and wine, and were considered family restaurants. If you wanted mixed drinks you went to private “bottle clubs”. Bottle clubs sold “set ups”, and you brought your own bottle. You left the bottle at the bar with your named taped on it, and bought rum & cokes or what ever you drank for 60 cents and they used your booze. The bar manager always kept his private stash back the bar for people like me that showed up thirsty and no booze. They made money off of me! I went to the Fleet Reserve just outside of Oceana, and also the EM Club on the base. There was also White Sands.
I was at the Fleet one night and a guy got really drunk and was kicked out about 1AM. We were leaving about 3AM and the guy was outside standing at attention, passed out cold!! We left him there and went on home.
I went to the “Nashville East” a lot after work and on my days off. Little Jimmy Dickens was singing there one night, and my friends and I sat and got drunk with him. He was a disgusting old womanizer, but a good performer on stage.
Once a friend of mine we called “Preach” had a party on a small yacht. I was impressed and thought it was pretty cool. I found out later he just crashed the boat and we were all trespassing!! YIKES!!! He knew the people were not around and helped himself aboard. I sure had classy friends, huh? It’s amazing I have never been arrested!
I dated a guy named Denny from Eastern Washington. He took me to Norfolk to see the Carpenters. It was a great concert. They had a perfect sound together. He took me to better places, but I got too drunk for him. He didn’t like the fact that I got drunk a lot. I just never knew when to slow down or quit drinking. The more fun I had, the faster I drank. It never occurred to me that I had a drinking problem then. I was having way too much fun!! I was at a “pool party” once with him and everyone was standing around sipping their cocktails. It was so boring. I decided to have fun, so drunk as I was, I jumped into the pool fully clothed! I was too drunk to realize I couldn’t swim. I had on a knit mini dress and stockings. Well the next day I woke up in a strange bed and still had the dress on, but it had shrunk to about half it’s size, and my false eyelashes and mascara were down my cheeks!! Boy was I ever a sight!! That was the last date I had with him. He must’ve lost my phone number or something!! HAHAHAHAHAHA
My sister woke me up one morning yelling at me to get dressed. I was naked on their living room floor and my brother in law found me!! I had no idea how I got there or who brought me home. Luckily I didn’t get pregnant that time. I wasn’t on the pill because I never planned on having sex. I just got drunk and things happened. I hated going to work the next day after getting that drunk because each guy that smiled at me I wondered if it was him, and what was he smiling at?!!
I was working one night and doubled over in excrutiating stomach pain. I was in so much pain I couldn’t walk. They rushed me by ambulance to the emergency room, and my boyfriend of the day was in the hall waiting for me. The doctor came in and asked me some questions and pulled the curtains to examine me. He stuck his finger inside my butt and I let out the biggest fart I have ever heard in my life!! The curtains blew sideways it was so big and loud!! He asked me what my diet consisted of, and I told him I drank beer and ate tacos every day. They sold tacos at the bar I worked at so that is what I ate. He suggested getting a better diet. Well there was no hiding the fact that gas was my problem that night!! My boyfriend soon to be ex heard it all!! When I got back to work the word was out!! I had the most expensive fart that night. $50.00!!
My brother in law had a sister Carol that came out to visit. She was a day older than I was and single. We were like two peas in a pod, and boy did we ever party!! We ended up getting an apartment together. We were not good examples for my sister’s kids, and couldn’t really party hardy there. I think Carol might’ve been a bit wilder than me. She was really thin and got a job waitressing at a place that had the gals wear negligees as a uniform!! Topless was really popular in those days.
I was told by a lot of people that things are going to be different when Ed the owner came back to town. I was afraid I would lose my job because he did not like the go go dancers and also Lori and Bob were not going to work there any more when Ed came back. I was working one night alone and about midnight a short pudgy cute guy came in and asked me all sorts of questions about the place and me. His name was Ed. A guy at the end of the bar told me it was the owner.

Tomorrow, meet Ed Free.

Tuesday, June 22, 2004

Chapter 16 More Virginia Beach!!

First of all, I want to reiterate the fact that I was responsible for all the stuff that happened to me!! My irresponsible drinking got me in all sorts of trouble!! None of that stuff would’ve happened if I hadn’t been drunk!
In Alcoholics Anonymous we work the 12 steps and one of the steps is making amends to persons we have harmed in our drinking history. I wish to make an amends to my sister. She stood by me through most of my stupid drunk stages and was there to pick up the pieces. I made amends years ago, but I still want to tell Mary Lou how deeply sorry I am for embarrassing you and exposing you and your kids to my drunkenness! (Even though I was free entertainment!) And thank you SO much for being my sister and loving me through all this!!

Working at the Red Baron Inn was a blast!! Good grief, I never considered it work. I was there having fun and getting paid for it too!! My boss Lori and her boyfriend Bob ran the Red Baron Inn for Lori’s ex-husband Ed Free while he was on cruise. He was in the Navy stationed on the USS Forestall on cruise in the Mediterranean Sea. I’ll get back to Ed later.
I drank after work every night. I made a lot of friends, and dated a lot! I was one of a very few gals in the area, and there were 9 bases!!
One of my dates was a Merchant Marine that was home for a month before going back out to sea. I forgot his name so I’ll call him Don. He treated me like a lady and had a lot of money! My brother in law Jim liked to come in the Red Baron when I was working because Don wouldn’t let Jim buy a drink. He bought the bar a round every time he bought a drink. My poor sister didn’t see much of Jim in those days. Once I was out drinking with Don in Norfolk, and I fell asleep on the way home. I woke up and felt like I had slept for a long time. I asked Don where we were, and he said North Carolina!! I said WHAT??? He said he wanted to take me home to meet his mother!! This was our second date!! We got as far as his sister’s house and I convinced him we needed to go back to Virginia Beach because I had to go to work in a few hours!! He said he would give me the money I would miss out of making if I’d go to meet his mom, but I wouldn’t hear it!! Geeze, how do I get in these messes? He was nice, cute and rich but not for me at that time. We dated other people and stayed friends.
I was bartending one night when we had a go-go dancer and a guy came in and asked if he could bring in his father. I said of course!! He said his father was from the hills of Tennessee and never been to a public bar much less one with a go-go dancer. I told him it would be fun to see his reaction. So in he comes with his hillbilly father. He was a huge man, muscular and about 6’5”. He lumbered up to the bar and they ordered beers.
His father turned to look at the dancer and yelled out real loud “My God, that girl is NAKED”!! We all lost it!! He was shy, and totally shocked at the sight. He couldn’t look at her!!. The poor guy he was old (probably 50) and never been in a public place like this.
I remember one guy had a party at his single wide trailer and we all got drunk. He passed out, and I was getting a ride home when we came across one of those sawhorse barriers with the flashing yellow caution light on it. Well I decided it would be cool to “borrow” it and leave it in the guy’s trailer. So we did. We placed it in the living room and left. The poor guy woke up that night and saw this bright eerie yellow flashing light coming from his living room!! He thought we were being invaded!! He had no idea where that came from!! HAHAHAHA

Monday, June 21, 2004

Chapter 15…….1972 Virginia Beach

We got down to Virginia Beach around May or June. My sister was living in a nice neighborhood about a mile up from the beach. She had a baby boy (Tim) in September 1971, and her daughter Donna who was 4 ½ and her husband that was in the navy stationed at Oceana. I found a doctor and went to see him. He did some tests and came out and told me I was pregnant!! I was in total shock!! I told him it was impossible because I didn’t have a boyfriend!! I explained the situation to him, but he said I was still pregnant!! I broke down in his office and he gave me a number to call if I wanted help. It was for Planned Parenthood.
I got home and called my friend in Alexandria. While talking with her, we came to the conclusion that I must’ve been taken advantage of in my drunken passed out state on the night of my party three months before. Someone must’ve hid in another room while she was getting people out of my apartment. I have no idea who, what, how many it could have been!! I was passed out!! I guess now-a-days they call it rape. Back then and even now I blame myself for getting so damned drunk I couldn’t function!!. Boy, that must’ve been really fun for the guy, huh? The bastard!! What goes around comes around buddy, you’ll get your due!!
So now here I am again, single, pregnant and now living across the country in a strange place. I had no idea what to do!! I was petrified!! I didn’t want this baby because I had no idea who the father was or even what race. I’m not prejudice, but in 1972 it wasn’t cool to have a baby out of wedlock and another race. I called the number for Planned Parenthood and the next thing I know I was flying up to LaGuardia airport. A man met me at the airport and drove me to the abortion clinic in a limousine. There was a lot of counseling and education before the procedure. I had plenty of time to change my mind, but I felt I had no other choice at that time. I was still hurt from having my stillborn two years before, and now really feeling guilty!! I thought it was horrible for me to have an abortion after losing another baby!! Was this what was supposed to happen? I didn’t want to go back on welfare, and I couldn’t see me moving home and I was living with my sister and no job. I prayed about it and asked for forgiveness and went on with the abortion. I flew back to Virginia Beach that same evening.
I decided I needed to look for a job to earn enough monaey to either go home or do something!!. I walked into a place called “The Red Baron Inn” and applied for a job. The gal there hired me right away. It was a tavern. What better place for a drunk to work??!! Whoo hoo!! I bluffed my way to learning the trade. But beer isn’t really hard to pour so it was easy and fun. Egads, I get to talk and flirt with all the guys and get paid for it too!! They were building a stage and I asked what it was for, and they said for the girls to dance on. HUH???? Go-go dancers. OH!! Okay!! Topless go-go dancers!! HUH?? UH-OH!!
Dear mom & dad, I am working at a topless go-go place…….as the bartender!!
The first night I worked as a waitress and there was a go-go dancer performing. I was sooo embarrassed!! I couldn’t look at her. The guys were all hooting it up, and I made great tips! The guys were a lot of fun and SINGLE!!
It didn’t take me long to make friends there. I worked at nights and drank at the after hours clubs and slept during the day.
I think I will break here so I can try and remember all that went on in Virginia Beach and post more tomorrow

Sunday, June 20, 2004

Chapter 14… Washington DC!!

September 1971
Steve called me and asked to come see me. I screamed and asked where he was and he said in Oak Harbor!! I was so surprised!! He came over and of course we visited mom & dad and went out on the town. He asked me to go to Washington DC with him. I wasn’t quite sure if I really wanted to commit myself to a relationship like that but I saw nothing but a dead end road here, so I thought what the heck!! Mom and dad gave me their blessings so I packed my bags, grabbed my cat and we left the next day. He said he had to drive down to Portland Oregon to pick up a friend that was going with us. Steve had a pickup truck with a camper on the back. We got to Portland and picked up his friend and his girlfriend. So here are 4 of us (and a cat) and a seat that fits three!! Well we figured they can ride in the back and then we all can take turns sleeping back there and drive straight through. It took us 2 ½ days to get there.
When we got to DC we drove to Alexandria Virginia where Steve had an apartment. He told me when we got there that he had a roommate and he hasn’t told him about me yet. So he asked me if I could sleep on the couch in the living room until the roommate moves out. Well I thought that was odd, but being the naïve girl I was, I agreed. Well it took a few weeks before the roommate moved then I moved into the bedroom. There was a double bed in there, and I was wondering where the roommate slept. DUH!!! Then I was wondering why Steve never came into the living room to sleep with me. Again, DUH!!! I just thought he respected me too much and wanted to wait until the time was right.
I got a job as a waitress and hostess at the Marriott Hotte Shoppe in Alexandria. They paid me 80 cents and hour and I had to declare 80 cents an hour tips which brought me up to $1.60 an hour minimum wage. I made much better tips so I wasn’t complaining! The job was fun. I had to wear my hair up above my shoulders, so I bought a shag wig and put my long straight blonde hair up under that. So here I am wearing a wig & false eyelashes. I thought I was really hip, and living in the big fancy city too!! Whoo Hooo! The situation with Steve was really strange. He was distant, and I was frustrated. He finally got drunk one night and tried to do the sex thing but he got sick and couldn’t do it!! Well that sure made me feel sexy!! Thanksgiving came and Steve’s parents came to visit then invited us to their place. I think they lived in New Jersey. We went to visit, and they put us in their guest room but Steve didn’t sleep in the bed with me. He didn’t want to make his parents think we were “doing it”!! For Heavens sake, we were living together!!! What else would they think??!! The situation never got better, so I decided to bail out of that relationship. He agreed it wasn’t going to work out, so he helped me find an apartment and helped me move in and that was the last I saw of him!! That was back in the days that gays never came out, and I am convinced now that he was gay. He was in the navy and he would’ve been kicked out if they knew, so I see now why he wanted me there. Oh well it got me across country and in a big city!!
I lived about 4 blocks from the restaurant that I worked at, so I walked to and from work. A block away was a little Greek café that I stopped at for coffee. A guy named Denny was the brother of the owner and he had a crush on me. Denny’s brother asked me if I would go on a date with Denny, and I said sure, but why doesn’t he ask me? Well Denny didn’t speak English! That was a fun date!! A cab picked me up and Denny was in the back. The driver took us to a Greek restaurant in downtown DC and there was a Belly Dancer there!! Denny ordered Ouzo and they brought it to us and poured it on ice and it turned white!! It tasted like licorice. I was impressed!! When he brought me back he came up to the apartment with me and we had more drinks. He kissed me and said Amore, come to Greece with me! Marry me! YIKES!! Heck no!!! They want their women barefoot and pregnant there!! So I didn’t date him any more. He was nice, but I wasn’t ready for any of that stuff!!
I was walking home from work one night and heard music coming from the theater next to the Greek restaurant. I walked in and there was nobody at the door so I walked into the seating area. There was a band playing great music and nobody in the audience!! I sat down and enjoyed my private little concert. They had a baldheaded black man that could sing great and dance all over the stage!! Some guy came up to me and asked what I was doing there and I told him so he said I could stay and listen to their practice jam session. I asked who the band was, and he said “Hot Tuna” . I never heard of them, but they were a spinoff of “Jefferson Airplane”!! Papa John Creach was HOT!!! They took a break and we all sat there and drank and smoked pot. Ya think the people in Coupeville would believe this??? NAW!!
I was invited to a Christmas party in the projects at Gail’s house. She was a waitress with me. I had a ball there!! The phone rang every 5 minutes, and I was asked if I wanted to buy a new color TV for $10.00. HUH??? I was the only white person there. Gail took me aside and told me her brothers belonged to a gang and they were selling HOT items. YIKES!!! Ya think the people in Coupeville would believe this??? NAW!! I was told I was drinking booze that was stolen during the DC riots of 1968!! YIKES!! Ya think the people in Coupeville would believe this??? NAW!! Gail’s brother took me home and told me I’d be escorted walking home from now on. He said they would protect me from harm. I got scared, but Gail assured me I was safe.
I had a party at my house and invited everyone from work. I remember we made a big wall of empty beer cans in my living room, and it fell quite a few times. I’m sure my neighbors really appreciated that!! I got really drunk and passed out on the couch. My friend kicked everyone out and locked the door. I woke up the next day naked!! YIKES!! Ya think the people in Coupeville would believe this??? YEP!! I called my friend and asked her what happened and she said I passed out and she kicked everyone out. I asked her if I was dressed and she said yes. Well I guess I must’ve pulled my own clothes off but I never did things like that before.
My parents drove out on a vacation to visit with me and tour DC. My sister drove up and toured with us, then they all drove down to Virginia Beach to visit with my sister. It was fun. I was so busy working that I never really got to see DC so I got the tour!!
I was working one night as cashier and the hostess came out to give me a 10 minute break. I was walking downstairs and she said as I was walking away she turned her head and stared down the barrel of a gun!! She was robbed at gunpoint!! I missed it by maybe 30 seconds!! She stepped back and let the guy take the money!! I would’ve gotten mad and got shot!! The police ended up shooting the guy and killing him after he robbed and shot a guy down the street!! My guardian angels at work again!!
I went on a date with a guy I met at work. He took me to a big lake in DC and it was night. It was really pretty at night with the lights and all. He stole a canoe and took me out in the lake in it. (I really had classy dates, huh?).
In March I was worried. I missed my period. I had cramps but no period. I went to a doctor and told him I haven’t had sex, so he did an exam and told me when the tests came in that I probably had a tumor. I totally freaked out, and called my sister. She drove up and got me and took me to Virginia Beach with her to see a doctor there.

Tomorrow…1972 Virginia Beach!!

Love letter to my Dad!

September 23, 1994

Dear Daddy,

Tomorrow you are being taken to Careage of Whidbey because you have a broken hip. It will only be for two weeks. I know how frightened you are, but please be reassured that we are not putting you away in an old folks home!! I love you too much to do that.

All my life you have been my hero. Ever since I was a baby I had to sleep with your boon-dockers for re-assurance that you were near. Mom said you even had to come home to feed me.

I was so afraid that you would come home from the Ranger Cruise and divorce mom. I prayed that if that happened that I would go with you.

When I started dating I was so afraid that you wouldn’t like my boyfriends.

When I married Larry, I thought I found someone to fill your shoes. He seemed to be a lot like you, but not really. He didn’t do the handy things around the house that you were so good at. After 13 years of marriage I realized it was no good.

You were such a good husband for mom. You sat back and let her do her thing, and waited for her to settle down. I’ve never seen anyone take their marriage vows so seriously. You haven’t even taken off the wedding band. You must have really loved her. I hope she knew how gifted she was to have found you. I’m sure glad she did.

All three of us kids love you very much. Do you realize how lucky you are to have three kids love you? I wish I had at least one!!

When I was pregnant and in Virginia I was so lonesome for home, and when you called me and asked me to come home, my heart burst. You and mom were right by my side through the whole still-born thing. Dad, I’m so sorry I put you through all of that!! I started drinking really hard after that, and I was totally out of control. I know now I must have put you through Hell. I’m so sorry for all of that. Please forgive me. I’ve been sober for 7 years and three months now, and realize that my life was a mess before. I’m trying my best to live a normal life now. Thank you so much for being my dad. I don’t know what I would do without you here.

It breaks my heart to see you laid up with a broken hip. Dad; Mary Lou, Mike and I are right by you to get you through this. Things will work out. I want you to get better, so we can go to Alaska and explore. You have a lot more years ahead of you if you follow doctor’s orders.

Please know we are with you through all of this.

I love you dearly!! Phyllis

I wrote this letter to my father when he was in the hospital with a hip replacement surgery. Mom died in January 1993. They were married for almost 50 years. We didn't show much love or hugs growing up, but we did love each other. I felt the need to tell him how much he meant to me! He died November 7th 1996.
I Miss you terribly dad, and love you with all my heart!!
Thank you for all you did for me!!

Saturday, June 19, 2004

Chapter 13…..1971, 21 years old and discovering BARS!!!

I was a waitress at the “Kennel” in downtown Oak Harbor. Oak Harbor is a small town about 4 miles from Naval Air Station Whidbey Island. Well, men are in abundance here, and being 21 and having free reign of the bars, it was heaven!! I had two roommates, Ellie and Ann. Ellie was about 7 years older than me, and Ann was 1 year younger. We would dress up all purty and head to town almost every night! There were dances at the Oak Harbor Tavern, and we would dance every dance!! There was a bald headed Chief (Josh) that would go to town in his dress blues and stand at the bar and drink room temperature Heidelburg beer. When he walked into a bar he would automatically buy the bar a round and every girl in the place a drink. We would know his “route” and would be a step ahead of him. We would go into the first bar and order a Black Russian (Vodka & Kahlua). They were expensive, but were all booze, and we would get at least three free ones at each place. We would watch him, and when he was half through with his second beer we would head to the next bar and be there when he came in to buy a round!! Heeheeheeheeheeheehee!! There were only two cocktail lounges (besides the private clubs) in Oak Harbor, but 6 Black Russians are enough for any drunk for one night!!
I would help out my roommates once in awhile cleaning houses. They were hired by the contractors when they built new houses to clean up after the builders were through. We survived paycheck to paycheck. I never knew what savings were. We would spend all our money in the bars.
There was a house of “druggies” living next door to us, and we would pull pranks on each other once in awhile. One day they were having a party and they all passed out about midnight. I snuck over there and put some wet newspapers in a metal bucket and lit it on fire to smolder a little. Then I pounded on the door and yelled FIRE!! They were all freaking out, and we were rolling in laughter. It sure ruined their mellow “high”. Egads, thinking back on it, it really isn’t that funny, but it was at the moment!! Remember, this is my drunk diary!!

The next day Ellie was baking a German Chocolate cake and I asked her what is was for, and she said for the neighbors, for a “peace offering”. I was feeding the cat, so I looked at the batter and poured some cat food in the batter. We baked the cake and they ate it, saying it was delicious!! We then told them it had “Friskies” in it. They moved a few weeks later. No sense of humor!!

I was at a party at my mom’s house and was driving home drinking a beer. I turned onto my street and I dropped the beer and bent to pick it up and went over the center line. Yep I got my DUI!! They made me park the car right where it was. I asked if I could park it in my driveway about 50 feet away and they said no. I was taken to the Police Station and blew the machine. They made me wait ½ hour and do it again. If I was that high the second time I was going to the hospital!! Heck, I wasn’t even drunk by my standards!! They called my mom to come get me and when she came into the Police Station she was bouncing down the hall screaming for her baby!! She was drunker than I was, and they looked at me and told me to take my mother to my house (a mile away) and keep her there!! (Dad was working at the base as a Firefighter at the time 24 hours on 24 hours off). They towed my car and impounded it, so I had to drive my mom’s car to my house. Back in 1971 a DUI cost me $179.00 which was a fortune to me!!
I was dating a guy in the navy (surprise) and he got orders to Crystal City by Washington DC to train to be an advisor for the Viet Nam war. After he left, one of my roommates got married and the other one was moving in with her boyfriend, so I moved in with my old roommate in Oak Harbor.
I was there about a month when my boyfriend got a 9 day vacation and drove all the way to visit me! He didn’t tell me he was coming. He asked me to go to DC with him, so overnight I packed my clothes and grabbed my cat and told my parents we were going, and off I went on a new adventure!!
Tomorrow….Washington DC!!

Friday, June 18, 2004

Chapter 12...The rest of 1970…

Remember folks, I am an alcoholic, and this is the story of my life as an alcoholic. I am writing this as a recovery tool through the AA steps.
Step 4: Made a searching and fearless inventory of ourselves.
Step 5: Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
Now this isn’t really an accurate step 4 or 5, but it is getting the story and cobwebs out of me!!

The rest of 1970…I was working at the Seagull Café and still living at the duplex at Fort Casey 4 miles away. My roommate moved out and I was in the place by myself. It was an old two story duplex built early in the century used for officers housing. There were four duplexes, and one small house. Mine had a full basement and the first story had a big breakfast nook, and huge kitchen, and a huge living room. Upstairs had two big bedrooms and a bathroom with an old fashioned clawfoot bathtub. Nobody lived in the other side of my apartment, but the next building had the 4 single guys living there. Nobody else lived in the area except my old roommate that lived in a small house at the other end. It was in the country and a spooky atmosphere. Perfect for parties!! Barry got tired of me getting drunk and quit coming over. He still visited me at the Café but knew I was off and running in the party department and he didn’t want any part of that. He was afraid I would end up a drunk like my mother. Well I guess I did, huh? One of the guys next door asked me to go to Seattle with him, so I did. He took me to the restaurant on the Space Needle, and to a concert to see BB King Jr at the Paramount!! It was great!! He had a Volkswagen van. Perfect for 1970!! He took me out on a boat too. We were out in the bay and it started to get choppy, and I started to panic so we came back in. That is good, because I heard it was the captain’s boat from the base!!
I went to parties and dances in Oak Harbor, but mostly stayed in Coupeville for my serious drinking. I was driving home one night and saw a guy walking down the road in the dark. It was three miles from town and near where I lived. I stopped to give him a ride and he said he was going to visit a guy that lived out by me. I told him they were all out on a 2 month carrier quall. He was disappointed because he said he hitchhiked all the way from California to see his friend. I told him he could stay in my basement. (I could lock my door from it). I told him I could not afford to feed him because I ate at the Café where I worked and didn’t keep food in my house. He said he needed a job so I helped him find a job on one of the farms. He stayed with me for a few weeks then disappeared. I don’t know his name or where he came from. When the guys returned I told Mike from California that his friend came by to visit and told him who he was, and Mike had no idea who I was talking about!! WEIRD!! The guy appeared in the middle of the night, I housed him and got him a job then he disappeared. He never seemed a threat at all to me, but I guess I am a very lucky gal!! My guardian angels at work again!! They will all have grey hair by the time they are through with me.
I let my brother who is 6 ½ years younger than me have a New Years party at my house. He invited about 5 of his friends and I bought the beer & wine. A bunch of 15 year old guys drinking it up!! They were all puking in about an hour!! My bathroom, my kitchen sink, outside my door!! Dad came to pick up the boys the next morning and mentioned he liked the new “decorations” on my old Christmas tree that was out by my back porch. I looked and there were chunks of bologna hanging off it!! Yep puke there too!! I guess loganberry wine and beer mixed is not a good drunk for 15 year old boys that had bologna sandwiches for dinner!! HAHAHAHAHA
I moved in to a small two story duplex in Oak Harbor with two other gals. They worked cleaning houses, and I got a job at a bigger restaurant there.
Tomorrow, 1971.

Thursday, June 17, 2004

Chapter 11 Back Home!!

This is a hard one to write, so bear with me folks…

Well now I am back home and 1970 is just a few days away. I am living with my parents and no job because I am too pregnant to get work. I still got medical care at the base because I was under 21 and living with my father who is a retired navy man. In February I will be 21 and the navy will still take care of me because it is a pre-existing condition. I was desperate to get back on my own, so I had to swallow my pride and go to the Welfare office! My God, it has come to that!! They accepted me, and I got a small place about 4 blocks from my parents. (Every place in Coupeville is about 4 blocks from each other).
A few girls from school threw a baby shower for me and I got a bunch of cute things. I set the baby’s room up real nice and was awaiting the “time” for it to come. All my drinking friends were off doing other things like getting married and moving away, so I sorta just hung out with my parents, and my friend Barry. Barry was a friend I met while waitressing at the Seagull Café. Barry’s mother lived in the duplex next door to me, and she was an older woman and a drunk. Barry hated drunks, and was upset at me when I drank at all my parties, but when I came crawling back home he was there for me. He was 10 years older than me and never been married. (He later told his sister that if he could find a girl like me he would marry her).
My 21st birthday was February 4th and I was 8 ½ months pregnant. I remember standing outside the Tavern until midnight and then walking in to get my “Birthday” beer. They all yelled at me that it wasn’t time yet, and I almost cried, so they let me in.
I would go to the tavern and sip on a beer once in awhile, or a coke. I don’t think I got drunk then because it made me sick. The baby was due in late February, and I was miserable. I was huge and miserable. It was March now, and still no baby. I went to the doctor every week and he said to come back the next week. The first week in March he decided to induce labor and told me to come in the next week for it. I was miserable, and feeling really weird. When I went in the next week, he said he was too busy, and to come back the next week. The baby was turning a lot and really doing some acrobatic maneuvers inside me. I went home, and three days later I was mopping the kitchen floor and felt a big “pull” in my stomach. It hurt, and the baby was really still after that, so I had my mother take me to the hospital on the base. They did some tests then x-rayed me and came in and told me the baby was dead! There was nothing they could do but send me home and wait for me to go into labor naturally. I don’t remember much after that. I was in shock. I wanted that baby so bad, and planned on raising it myself. Then I went into the guilt mode. Did I do something wrong? Am I being punished for being a bad girl? After all was done, the doctors told me the baby was separated from the placenta and died. If they would’ve induced labor when they said they would, it would not have happened!! I was so hurt and angry!! Barry was right by my side. What a good friend he was. On March 23rd I woke up in the morning and peed my pants. (My water broke). They took me in to the hospital and I had 12 hours hard labor. Mom was in the delivery room with me and Dad and Barry were in the waiting room. They said the entire hospital could hear me screaming. I was afraid and angry, and let the world know!! The baby finally came out and I sat up to try and see it. They whisked it away from me and wouldn’t let me see him. It was a boy weighing 9 ½ pounds. I had to name him, so I named him Michael (after my brother) Lee (after his father’s middle name), then I had to put Bazzell for the last name because my old fashioned parents didn’t want a bastard son named after the family name! (I got over it). I had to sign a birth certificate then sign a death certificate. The following morning I was in bed and there was a gal and her husband in the next bed. She had a miscarriage and the Priest was praying for them. I asked if he would come over and pray for me too, and he asked if I was Catholic, and I said no, and he did not come pray for me. Again, here I was in 1970 and just had a baby out of wedlock. Shame on me!! PRICKS!!! It took me many years to get over the rejection from a man of Faith! I felt so dirty and ashamed, and blamed myself for everything that happened to me.
When I got home the next day I opened the door to the baby's room and it was empty!! Mom & Dad took everything away!! They thought they were keeping me from more pain, but it didn't work. I was so lost!! I had no idea what the baby looked like, where he was and where the baby things were. It was all taken from me. It was like it never happened!! But I know it did, and I was hurting from it!!
To top things off, I got a letter from the Welfare Office telling me that I was no longer eligible for benefits for the month of March because I was not pregnant and did not have a baby, so I had to return the check I received March 1st!! I went to the Seagull Café and got my job back and repaid the Welfare Office. I was on Welfare for two months and swore I would NEVER EVER ask for help again!! I never needed to after that.

Again, Barry was right by my side through all of this!!
He still worked on the Turkey farm and would come to the Café where I worked every night. He would take me to the movies, and have me over for dinner. He was such a gentleman, and always treated me with respect. He was such a good friend, but that’s all it was, a friendship. I moved to a place out by Fort Casey three miles from town, and had a roommate that had a little girl. There was a house next door with 4 bachelors living there. PARTY TIME!!! We had a ball!! We spent a lot of time at the Tavern and then home to drink more. Sometime during this period, the guy that got me pregnant came by and asked if he could see the baby!! I was flabbergasted!! I told him I had no idea where the baby’s ashes were. My parents had him cremated and didn’t tell me where they had the ashes put. He said he didn’t know the baby was stillborn. He left, and that was the last I hoped I would see of him. I don’t know why I was mad at him, I was the one that decided to “do it” with him, and got pregnant. I just didn’t want to be reminded of that period of my life.
Okay, that is enough for tonight. I will get back to the parties tomorrow!
Have a great Friday!!

Wednesday, June 16, 2004

Chapter 10 Virginia Beach 1969

My sister wanted me to ride across the United States with her and her 2 year old daughter Donna because it is scary driving alone with a two year old. My life was in a shambles at that time and we all decided it was the best thing to do.
Before we left for the East Coast my father brought over a 6 pack of beer to the restaurant where I was working and we sat there and drank it after closing and got drunk together. We both opened our hearts and souls. I told him how I was mad at him for not writing to us kids when he was overseas in 1960 and mom was running around the town. He said he did write letters but never got any from us. Well we figured it out that mom intercepted all the letters. I forgave her for that and so did dad. It was a bad time for them but he stuck by her. What a man!! When I left we were fine with each other and he wasn’t angry with me for not getting married.
We planned to drive down the coast to Bakersfield then to San Diego to visit our Aunts, then over to El Paso Texas to visit our other Aunt, then on to Virginia Beach. We had a friend (Corky) that was transferred to Virginia Beach at the same time, so he said he would drive the same route that we did. (Kind of a like a protector/guardian). My parents asked that I didn’t tell any of the relatives that I was pregnant because it would embarrass them. Being a pregnant single gal in 1969 was not cool. We left Coupeville on Halloween 1969 and drove down to Salem Oregon to visit with our cousins, then on to Bakersfield. We had to stop at a motel on the way, so to save money we all stayed in the same room. It was rather awkward, as Corky was there and we all needed showers. We finally got the showers and jumped into bed and covered up when Corky took his shower. He came out and jumped in his bed and we saw him put a gun under his pillow. We giggled thinking he was afraid of us girls and needed protection from us!! We were driving into Bakersfield and about there is when we lost sight of Corky and never saw him again until we got to Virginia Beach. Just as well, he was kind of weird. We had a nice visit with Aunt Dutch in Bakersfield and Aunt Marjory in San Diego then stopped in El Paso and had a great visit with Aunt Peggy. Her husband was a Border Patrol there. She was involved with the garden club and other hoity-toity societies in El Paso. Her big secret was that she got married in a boxing ring!! Uncle Don was a middle weight in his early years!! The rest of the trip was interesting, and it was fun to hear the southern accents in the deep south!! We got to Virginia Beach and Mary Lou got an apartment a block from the beach. She got married in November to Jim Chandler and he was a good father and husband. He was very fussy when it came to cleanliness. I remember him making a big issue of putting a pull tab in the trash when it was left on the counter. I also remember once Mary Lou telling me about the time he was eating ice cream and started gagging and spitting it out in the sink!! She asked what was wrong, and he told her there was a bug in it. She said geeze, Jim, it’s a cherry!! HAHAHAHAHA
I got a job waitressing in a little Greek restaurant on Virginia Beach Blvd. The “Excellent Café”. The place was run by the Greek owners and only two could speak English. It was getting close to the Holidays so I convinced them they needed to decorate for Christmas. They let me go buy some decorations and we decorated a tree. They taught me how to do the “hanky” dance, and I had a lot of fun with them. They were really nice people. They “adopted” me and told me they would help me when my baby was born. I have always been blessed with good friends!! It wasn’t a sin to drink or smoke while pregnant in those days, but I didn’t drink much during the pregnancy because it made me sick. Well Christmas came and went and boy was I ever homesick!! I was 7 months pregnant and beginning to get worried about how I will survive supporting the baby and making the medical bills. I was talking with dad on the phone and we both started crying. Dad wired me the money for a plane ticket to go home the next day!!
I think it was December 27th when I flew home. I remember flying into Chicago and we had to prepare for a crash landing because of the ice and snow all over the runway!! The plane slid sideways but didn’t crash. WHEW!!
I got home safe and sound and my friend Barry picked me up at the airport and brought me home. I was welcomed with open arms and love!!
Tomorrow the next chapter in my life.

Tuesday, June 15, 2004

Chapter 9…More 1968

Continuation of my life story....(The story began in May)

About this time I met a friend that we have become lifetime soulmate type friends. Irene. We have gone years without writing, but will always be close friends. Irene lives in Vancouver Washington by Portland Oregon and found me from a forwarded email she got from a friend. My old email address was ( She only knew one Phyllis from Whidbey so she emailed me and we keep in touch now. We used to have ESP together. I would pick up the phone and we’d start talking and about ten minutes later we would say “wait a minute, who called who?? The phone never rang!!” We would head out to some parties in the woods, and I would get my "weird" feelings, and start to panic and we'd get the heck outa there. We drove out one road while the cops were driving in the other road. people started to go by my "feelings". If they saw me start to act weird, we'd move the party. We can’t really remember where or when we met, but it was at some party. She was a year younger than me and lived in Oak Harbor with her parents. She only drank whiskey and coke and that was very seldom. I don’t think I ever saw Irene drunk. I can remember her smiling and laughing all the time. Boy did we ever have FUN!! She always had a Coke. She had as much fun as all of us, but didn’t get sick like me because I always drank myself into oblivion and she stuck with Coke. She was not an alcoholic like me, but she was always laughing at/with me. She met her husband through me. My father was a jailer at that time and the jail was about 4 blocks from my brown shack. My parents lived about 5 blocks away. One night about 4 guys came to my party and said they always wanted to come here. I asked where they heard about my parties, and they said they could hear them from the jail when they were there.
I was having a Keg party once when we ran out of beer. We had bought the beer at the Chiefs Petty Officers club, and called them and asked if we could trade in the empty, and they said to come on over, so 4 of us jumped in the car and went and bought the beer. About a mile from the club I ran out of gas. Along came Officer Sharp asking if all was ok. I told him we ran out of gas, and he looked in the back of the car and noticed the huge keg sitting in the back. I wasn’t worried because it wasn’t tapped. But….we were all under 21!! Four underage people at the party, and it was us that went for the beer!! DUH!! Well he gave us all a ticket for minors in possession of alcohol, and confiscated our keg. (the deputies later had a party with it!!). The guys had to spend a few days in jail because they were just out for other charges. I was having another party and knew the guys could hear my music, so I snuck up to the jail and tied a 5th of vodka from the window of the jail cell window and stuck a long plastic “relief tube” in it and stuck the other end through the window. Dad said the next day that the prisoners were all drunk, and he didn’t know how!! Hehehehehehe. Only in a small town!!!
Those parties continued for a few months. During that time my old boyfriend that was in Viet Nam started writing me and saying he was coming back in a few months. Swell. He showed up one night and didn’t like what he saw. I had long straight hair and wearing flowered bell bottomed hip hugger pants. We went our separate ways. My drinking was becoming a nightly occurrence and I blacked out a lot!! My boss was getting mad at me for coming in hung over and being late. Town was-a-talkin!! The guys got their own place and the parties started to move over there. I was on a three day binge and never showed up for work or went home. When I finally went home it was a shambles. Someone had gone in and threw all my albums out in the yard and really trashed the place. My parents were scared that I was kidnapped or murdered!! I was starting to get ugly in my drinking. I was kinda going with one guy and we got intimate one night. He got a job in Everett and we went different ways. Well a month or so later I discovered I was pregnant, and decided to keep the baby. My parents insisted that I marry the guy and I didn’t want to. He was going on with his life and I was in Coupeville. We were not in love. My sister was driving to Virginia Beach with her two year old daughter to get married about that time and asked if I wanted to go there with her. I jumped at the chance to get away from this small town gossip and parents that wanted to make me get married. So in the Fall of 1969 we went to Virginia Beach Virginia to start a new life!
Tomorrow, Virginia Beach here we come!!!!

Monday, June 14, 2004

I'm Baaaaaack!!

Ok, The fun is over Mary Lou!!
I finally got my computer back after 5 days of being down!! It was a corrupted somethingorother in the whatchamacallit. I paid a guy $100.00 to take it for the weekend and fix it!! He did, so I am back and runnung I hope for a long time!! WHEW!! I was busy all weekend so I didn't really have time to feel lost, but I did feel rather weird!! We sure get hooked on things, huh?
I will get back to posting maybe Wednesday. I found I need to give myself other time to do things. I come home from work and sit in front of the computer and next thing I know it is time for bed, and I did nothing else. I need to manage my time better. HAHAHAHA We'll see.
Meantime, I have alot of reading to catch up on, then try and get back to my life story that I seemed to back off on!! Later, folks!!

Sunday, June 13, 2004

PHYLLIS loves Fart jokes....

Man Who Loved Baked Beans

Once upon a time, there lived a man who had a terrible passion
for baked beans. He loved them, but they always had an
embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction on him. One day he met
a girl and fell in love. When it became apparent that they would
marry, he thought to himself, she'll never go through with the
marriage with me carrying on like this, so he made the supreme
sacrifice and gave up beans.

Shortly after that they were married. A few months later, on his
birthday and on the way home from work, his car broke down.
Since they lived in the country, he called his wife and told her
that he would be late because he had to walk home. On his way
home, he passed a small cafe and the wonderful aroma of baked
beans overwhelmed him. Since he still had several miles to walk
he figured he could walk off any ill affects before he got home.
It was, after all, his birthday. So he went in and ordered, and
before leaving had 3 extra large helpings of baked beans.

All the way home he putt-putted. By the time he arrived home he
felt reasonably safe. His wife met him at the door and seemed
somewhat excited. She exclaimed, "Darling, I have the most
wonderful surprise for you for dinner tonight!" She put a
blindfold on him, and led him to his chair at the head of the
table and made him promise not to peak. At this point he was
beginning to feel another one coming on. Just as his wife was
about to remove the blindfold, the telephone rang. She again
made him promise not to peek until she returned, and away she
went to answer the phone. While she was gone, he seized the
opportunity. He shifted his weight to one leg and let go. It was
not only loud, but ripe as a rotten egg. He had a hard time
breathing, so he felt for his napkin and fanned the air about
him. He had just started to feel better, when another urge came
on. He raised his leg and RRIIPPP !!! It sounded like a diesel
engine revving, and smelled worse. To keep from gagging, he
tried fanning his arms a while, hoping the smell would
dissipate. He got another urge. This was a real blue ribbon
winner, the windows shook, the dishes on the table rattled and a
minute later the flowers on the table were dead.

With his blindfold still on, when he heard the phone farewells
he neatly laid his napkin on his lap and folded his hands on top
of it. Smiling contentedly, he was the picture of innocence when
his wife walked in. Apologizing for taking so long, she asked if
he had peeked at the dinner table. After assuring her he had not
peeked, she removed the blindfold and yelled, "SURPRISE!!!"

To his shock and horror, there were twelve dinner guests seated
around the table for his surprise birthday party.

Saturday, June 12, 2004

June 12, WORLD Naked Bike Ride Day

Yep, It is!! Major cities all over the world are organizing these bike rides to protest our dependancy on world oil.

Guess I better get my lawn chair ready and park it along the highway so I can watch!


Friday, June 11, 2004


Phyllis is DOWN!!! Her 'Puter died!! We do not know the prognosis as yet, hopefully it has just passed out, and is not DEAD! She is waiting for someone to come fix it, but beings as how this is a National day of mourning and everything is closed, and tomorrw is the weekend, it may be awhile! MAy be only an hour or two, but meanwhile, you need to go over to MY BLOG and sign in!! She may come over and update, but don't count on it!

Mary Lou

Monday, June 07, 2004

37 years ago....

I graduated by the skin of my teeth. Coupeville High School class of 1967. The school is a very small farm school, and there were only about 28 kids in the graduating class. (I think I was #20, I didn't do alot of studying).

Ah, to be that innocent and THIN again!!
Hey, I had a long neck then!!! What happened???
Little does she know what lies ahead of her!!
Mwahahahahaha (sigh)

Sunday, June 06, 2004

Vacation is over.........WAAAAAA!!

Well it is Sunday night and I am getting the house ready for the work week ahead. I just had two weeks off, and am wondering how it went so danged FAST!! I have another weeks worth of things to do, but at least the floors are put in and the camper is cleaned and put away, the tomatoes are planted, My closet is purged and all my clothes washed ironed and put away!! I have gone through MOST of my junk drawers and piles of paperwork that I absolutely have no idea why I keep them!! I am shredding most of them!! Sheesh, but I sure am the clutter collector, and I HATE clutter!! As I organize and clean, I turn around and generate yet MORE clutter!!
Enough of my blabber. Hope everyone has a great week!! Monday morning is sneaking up really fast!!
Later, folks!!

Saturday, June 05, 2004

Friday, June 04, 2004


Well my floors still aren't done, but very very close!!
He will come back on monday to finish. I can't really put everything in it's place because the trim isn't done yet, and a small spot in the hall needs to be done. There went my vacation! But it was worth it!! It doesn't look like the same place!! I rearranged everything and bought a new fan to put in the kitchen also some small throw rugs for the kitchen.
I sure am spending the money I don't have yet!! HAHAHAHA
I already have the spot picked out for the Christmas tree!! I feel like I have moved into a new house!!

I cleaned out my tent trailer and put it away for the rains tomorrow, and planted four tomato plants in whiskey barrels. I am ready for a relaxing two days before going back to work on Monday!

Now I need to get back to my life story.

Have a great weekend, and remember....If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.

Thursday, June 03, 2004

Wha the...............????

Of all nights to happen.......I am sleeping out in my tent trailer tonight because the furniture in my house is all piled up in my kitchen and my bed is on it's side in my living room because my floors are still being installed. I left the door to my house and the door to my trailer open so my cat can come in and sleep with me in the trailer, then go to the house to use the litter box if she needed to. My friend made me promise to close the doors because of all the weirdos in my trailer park. Well good grief, I really don't think anyone would bother me, so I broke my promise. I went to bed at midnight and my cat crawled on the sleeping bag with me. I was sound asleep and a bright light woke me up. It sweped by my tent and faded out. Well that startled me so I got up and looked outside. Not a thing was stirring outside, so I went back inside and got back in my sleeping bag. Then KABOOM...crackle...shake!!! Well THAT got me up and out of my tent really fast!!! My cat and I both levitated and she about tripped me getting out of the tent before me!! My heart was thumping out of my chest and I tried to run like Hell but OOOPS!! I forgot about my CPAP machine and the mask on my face!! Okay, got that off and then continued levitating out and into my safe house!! I thought at first it was thunder. Well not a cloud in the sky, and the full moon was shining. Hmmmm, now that got me wondering what the heck it was????!!! I came in my house and called my sister who lives 7 miles away and she heard it too!! I waited ten minutes and called the ICOM dispatcher to ask her if there were any reports of an explosion, and she said yes, there are conflicting reports of maybe an earthquake or a meteor. Earthquake no, my stomach would tell me if it was an earthquake. But meteor, possibly. I did see the bright light before the noise. The dispatcher told me to turn on the emergency radio. Well all I'm getting is a weather report. Now I am WIDE AWAKE and it is 3:30 AM. I need to get some sleep because I am starting physical therapy tomorrow. (1.5 hours of exercising to strengthen my lungs and back). Okay, my adrenaline is down to a wide awake psycho now instead of a raving maniac, so I will try and go back outside where the monsters lurk and get some sleep!! Later, folks!

Wednesday, June 02, 2004

Still hangin in there!!

Well my floors are about 1/2 done now. It is taking MUCH s l o w e r than I anticipated, but it is going to look great!! My living room furniture has been stacked in my kitchen since Friday, and the old carpet and padding is piled on my new patio!! I guess he will haul it all to the dump when he is through. The sun has finally come out and will be nice for the next few days! YAY!! At least I will have a few good days for my vacation.
I can't think yet to post any more, so I am off to get my hair cut!! That will make me feel better!!
Next week all will be back to normal!! But then WHAT IS NORMAL????