I have been quiet because I have alot on my mind. Work is going well, I found a new Church that I like. Not new, but new to me. Sherry and Mike go there so I decided to go there for support for my brother Mike.
That leads me to Mike. He is the man in my life. Or should I say was. He always came over if I asked him to help me on my deck or something that my female brain cannot do. Since his diagnosis of cancer 18 months ago, he has been sick. He cannot work or even do chores around his house. His wife Sherry has had to do everything herself. Bless her heart, she even gets out there to split wood. They have a woodstove for heat in the house. She finally broke down and bought a portable heater for the living room.
This past week Mike has had a tough go of it. The chemotherapy has made him so sick that he doesn't eat any more. They put a line in his port to give him some vitamins and nourishment. So the cure is killing him slowly. He has turned anorexic and he is also hooked on pain pills now. He gets his pain pills, pain patches and injections of oxycodone.
Last week I went over to his house after work just to sit with him and let him know he is not alone. Tuesday I went over and sat on his bed with him and just held his hand for about 1/2 hour. I didn't have much to say, but that was ok. Just being there was fine. He finally got up and we sat in the living room watching tv. Wed night I took over some French Vanilla ice cream and some Reeds extra ginger, ginger beer (non alcoholic) and we had some floats. Now he ate that and kept it down!! My gosh, I will never have a rootbeer float any more. Ginger float is MUCH tastier!!
I sat and crocheted while he watched tv. Sherry needs the break. Just knowing someone is there with Mike is a relief to her. Mary Lou will go over there on Wed during the day to sit with him until I get off work at 4:30, then I will go over and crochet and sit with him. The gals from the Church have offered to go over and clean the house once in awhile.
My gosh, we are never really prepared for this to happen in our lives.
I have accepted that Mike will be with the Lord soon. In fact I pray it IS soon. It is killing me watching him suffer like he is.
Last wednesday we were talking and somehow the subject came up about the stillborn I had in 1970. He said what stillborn? I told him, and he said "well they sure hid that from me"!! No we didn't. He was there. Then Sherry said he was babbling and not making sense on Sunday.
I had a close friend with lung cancer and it went to his brain and he was acting bizarre too. I pray it is not in his brain.
Sherry came by this morning and said she was afraid to leave him alone anymore. She has to work and is gone 12 hours a day. She said Home Health is coming over this morning to assess him. I called the nurse and told her about Mike this past week. When she got to the house she took a blood draw and then called Sherry and said he should not be left alone. Sherry called me and I left work at 11:30 to go sit with Mike. At 12:30 Sherry called me again and said the nurse called the doctor and the doctor told her to get him to the emergency room for tests. So I took him in and they are keeping him over night and doing alot of tests on him. A CT scan of his head is one. I'm glad they are doing that just to rule out.
So, that is where I'm at these days.
Prayers are good.
Appreciate them!
This is killing me slowly!
